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Words to a Friend after Her Miscarriage

Sometimes life is painful and there is no immediate explanation or reason for the pain. When pain sets in, our mind becomes a flurry of feelings and emotions. Doubts swirls in this storm. So, it is fitting, sometimes, for someone outside the storm to speak a word of truth – a simple ray of light – that can beacon us back to safe shores.

This week a friend of mine had a miscarriage. Many of you have gone through this same pain. There is hurt, a sense of loss, and circulating around all of this is the question, “Why?” My friend was grieving because she thought she had done something wrong, or maybe failed to do something right. These are my words to her:

You have done nothing wrong. We live in a world where sin, destruction, and pain rule the day. That day is drawing to a close and one day Jesus will right every wrong. So, trust him in the storm.

I build this faith on several passages of Scripture. Here is one: “And [Zechariah and Elizabeth] were both righteous before God, walking blamelessly in all the commandments and statutes of the Lord. But they had no child, because Elizabeth was barren…” (Luke 1:6-7)

There it is. They were both righteous and barren. That is, their inability to have children was no punishment from God. Instead, it was part of a delay. A long (and I am sure very painful) delay of God’s blessing. They would eventually have their son and Jesus would call him the greatest man ever born of a woman. (Matthew 11:11)

So I would say to her as I said to my wife after our miscarriage. Your child is in heaven, they are not lost, we will see him or her one day and I will walk beside you while the blessing is delayed.

I Love You My Dear Friend!

Pastor Mitch

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